Today someone explained to me that my attention to tumblr and my ability to find posts even when they’re not on my tag is threatening and worrisome. Evidently this practice is unusual and makes people in the fandom uncomfortable.
It seems that it’s not because I have misused this ability directly, but rather that the potential for misuse is there and that itself casts a chill over any sort of fandom connected to me. Couple this with just recently having an accusation that I make light of the struggles people have with self-harm, and I’m… not sure it’s wise I continue to use Tumblr the way I have been.
Pretty much at least once a week I receive a Tumblr mail from someone censuring me for abusing my “power,” such as it is. From folks saying my engagement with artists “leads them on and encourages them to work with you for free” to “what we do not need is another heterosexual white male telling stories to us” to “your relationship with Su disgusts me, you treat her like a slave” to “your engagement to the fandom makes me uncomfortable” and “never read the fan fiction, it is not for you.”
I honestly don’t know what any of this is. I never really considered the need to express that much care with “fans” because I’ve never had them before. I am starting to wonder if I’ve actually committed a terrible mistake.
So much of where I’ve gone with all this has been accidental. I had a chance to meet some Yogscast members, I had an opportunity to improve upon a modpack and work with an amazing community at FTB to do it, I had the good fortune of 3-5 months of relatively light work at a good job so that I could make time to kickstart that project. I guess things have just gotten out of hand, a run of good luck stemming from a fair sum of privilege.
I’m sorry I overstepped my boundaries, folks. I’m not sure how I’ll proceed from here. I think at the very least I’ll keep reblogging the awesome art I see and passing some of it upwards to other people on reddit and at the Yogs office. That, at least, should be harmless or net-good. I’ll do my best to let you all do your things, and if you want to engage me I’ll keep doing forums at my livestream where you can clearly opt-in.
Ok, I don’t usually write in the post itself, but this post really gets to me. Dave, as a member of the Tumblr fandom, I can honestly say I love how you interact with us. Never before have we had a member so active in the tumblr fandom and it’s great.
You follow us, you talk to us, you reblog our posts, and even ask questions when you don’t understand. Coming from someone who has always wanted a person like this, it’s like a dream come true. Not to mention that you add to your own lore. You not only freely add to it through reblogs and random comments, but, if we ever have questions, we know we can come to you and ask you directly.
On that note, I always enjoy seeing your comments on posts and reblogs. You never fail to makes me think in new and different ways and I love it. You are as far from the “typical cis white male” as I can imagine. Your comments on these issues have proven that, if nothing else, you are trying to change and to become a better person than you already are.
As much as I love Tumblr and the community of it, I also know that people here are cruel and terrible at times. Sadly, a great deal of this fanbase is young and Tumblr can be a very toxic environment. It is so easy to fall into the “I hate cis white males” faction of Tumblr and a lot of the time, these people think they are justified in their actions to hate them.
What I’m trying to say here is, please don’t stop what you are doing. I know so many people who love what you are doing here and would agree with what I’m saying. We love you Dave, we really do. And even if everyone isn’t of the same mind, a great deal of us are.
I wish I could make those people stop. I wish I could take away their hateful comments to you. But, alas, I cannot.
What I can do, however, is express to you how much you mean to me and the rest of this fandom and implore you not to stop.